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Year 13

February 17, 2013

I have been married to Curt for 13 years, and we have been together for 15. We met on a 50 mile bike ride, and the rest is history. We just….. clicked. While many people know him, many people don’t. Not only is he a triathlete, he’s a 5 time age group National Champion for triathlon, he’s been national champ for duathlon, he’s done Kona, and his last Ironman was a 9:54.

We are a triathlon family and to be very honest….. it’s not a balancing act. I can’t imagine being married to someone who not only didn’t love what I love, but didn’t support what I love. And vice versa. It’s our lifestyle.

Curt and I are polar opposites. Yin and yang. I am a spaz, and he’s super calm and laid back. I am loud, he’s quiet. I am social, he’s more of an introvert, (but not antisocial). He loves short course, I love long course (and he’s great at both). He is the grounding factor of my life. He pulls me in when I work too much, do too much and overextend myself.

Many people are surprised to learn that we don’t train together. It’s for no real reason except…. we don’t need to be each others training partner and we respect each others training time as our time for ourselves. Both of us train quite early, and if we end up on our bikes at the same time in the garage (aka pain cave), it’s just because we happen to be there at the same time.

It’s common ground and freedom. We don’t get competitive with each other but we will push each other in our own ways. Each of us wants to see the other excel and achieve. We do it extremely positively. I am incredibly grateful for that.

We discuss with each other our goals for the season and what races we will do. Curt loves to go to Nationals, and he loves to make a boys trip out of it. I tend to go to half Ironman and Ironman races with my Qt2 mates. When he does Ironman…. I don’t. That’s too much on a family in a season. In the summer Curt does a lot of the Score-This races… I announce them and Luc works as part of the race crew. When it’s my turn to race I tend to tell them…. if you are at the finish line… great… if not…. no big deal. My races are long and the allure of watching mommy start an Ironman are long gone.

Neither of us take entire days to train…. that’s not good for the family. It’s why you see us up at 3-4am. We get up, get it done and then we make sure we do normal family things. Our multisport lifestyle awards us with fitness and appreciation for the way we are able live off the field. I think we carry a lot of gratitude with us.

Being a multisport family…. for us…. is relatively easy. It’s not dramatic, it’s not tense. It just tends to flow along. I think that’s because our priorities are aligned. Our son is first no matter what. Nothing gets put before him. As important as multiport is to each of us… it’s always in the background.

People ask me all the time about balance. I can’t say I live a balanced life…. I live an integrated life. I see athletes trying to maintain this magic balancing act, and even they can’t define it…. so they spend a lifetime trying to be balanced. Which really means chasing a target that they can’t define. I roll it all into one and it all just seems to fit. Naturally, easily. It’s the life I choose, we choose…. so why make it hard?

You don’t get to year 13 of marriage on a beam of perfection. We like every couple on earth… have our moments. Our trends….. that’s normal. But multisport should enhance your life….. not rule it. Whatever level you are at

Did I know on that 50 mile ride 15 years ago that I met “the one”. Yep. I sure did. Here is to many more!

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4 comments

  1. Great love story 🙂 My husband and I are approaching year 23 and just “fit” together. We both run marathons at completely different paces and he has supported me on my firsts (i.e. my first 50 miler this past Fall) by not only helping me train but actually running it alongside me. This year, he’ll run Boston; I’ll be the head cheerleader/support crew in whatever manner I can be. I’ll run a May marathon; he’ll take the cheerleader/support role.

    It’s only as hard as we make it. Happy 13 to you!


  2. Love this Mary! I like the idea of living in harmony as opposed to balance. Balance means all things equal, harmony is everything working together but not necessarily equal. You guys have found what works!!


  3. Woohoo to year 13. Happy Anniversary. Wishing you tons more years of growing together (but separate). Great love story!


  4. Awwww. I heart love stories. Happy anniversary you two.



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